Redo, Retry, Rerun

So we were driving back from our camp trip a few weeks ago and we were stuck in traffic.  A few cars in front of me in the other lane there was this car towing a horse wagon.  (Is that what they’re called?  If they aren’t, then that’s what they should be called.)  Now horses seem like such beautiful creatures.  They have long legs, a silky smooth coat and they are extremely elegant in their movements.  But the truth is, any sort of beauty is lost as soon as you see someone take a shit.  I mean, here we are on the highway and this horse lifts it’s tail up and dumps a hot steaming load onto the highway.  It’s a good thing the guy behind that wagon wasn’t tailgating.  He might have had to drive home with a load of horse shit on top of his hood.  There’s something that would definitely be handy for James Bond if he had to drive through Toronto – a horse shit ejector in the back of his Aston Martin, to keep people from tailgating him.
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Remember in Spiderman when Mary Jane asked Peter to kiss her once to see if he had any feelings for her?  I’m just wondering, if you’re in that position and you’ve just had onions for lunch, or you went to dim sum and you’ve got some bok-choi (Chinese greens) stuck in between your teeth; can you take some sort of rain check on that?  It’s sort of like when you play monopoly and your dice rolls off the board, you get a redo.  I think that’s only fair for both players.  I doubt either one of the two people involved would feel “it” with a piece of bok-choi in the way.

Mary Jane – “Kiss me once and tell me you don’t feel anything for me.”
Peter Parker – “Do you have a toothpick and some gum?”
Mary Jane – “No I don’t.  Just kiss me.”
Peter Parker – “Can I take a rain check?  I’m not feeling very…fresh right now.”
Mary Jane – “I’m getting married tomorrow!”
Peter Parker – “I’ll have fresh breath and white teeth tomorrow!”
Mary Jane – “Forget it.”
Peter Parker – “But I had bok-choi for lunch!”
Mary Jane – “What the hell is bok-choi?”
Peter Parker – “They’re Chinese greens and they get between your teeth sometimes.”
Mary Jane – “I’ll bok-choi you if you don’t kiss me!”
Peter Parker – “I just can’t.”
Mary Jane – “I don’t understand you at all Peter Parker.”